Texas Republican Party Belongs on Mars

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Good afternoon:

The Texas Republican Party platform is beyond stupid.

Charles Pierce of Esquire Magazine explains why.

If you want to see the clearest symptoms of the prion disease that has devoured the brain of the Republican party, the state Republican party is your Patient Zero. And, before a whole bunch of people in the Beltway media playpen begin minimizing this craziness because it pretty much shatters the whole idea of Both Sides Doing It without which most of those people can’t get out of bed in the morning. This isn’t four guys in camo in Idaho. This isn’t a guy broadcasting on a short-wave from upper Michigan, or receiving the truth about chemtrails and the Illuminati through his teeth. This is the Republican party representing the state from which we got our last Republican president, and one of the biggest states in the Union. This is what it believes, as summed up with reality-based parentheticals by Hendrik Hertzberg at The New Yorker:

That the Texas Legislature should nullify-indeed, “ignore, oppose, refuse, and nullify”-federal laws it doesn’t like. (Unmentioned is the fact that, beginning in 1809, the Supreme Court has steadfastedly rejected state nullification of federal laws.); That when it comes to “unelected bureaucrats”-i.e., pretty much the entire federal work force above the janitorial level-Congress should “defund and abolish these positions.”; That the Seventeenth Amendment, which was adopted in 1913, be repealed, so that “the appointment of United States Senators” can again be made by state legislators, not by voters. (Admittedly, the Texas Legislature could hardly do worse.), That all federal “enforcement activities” within the borders of Texas-including, presumably, the activities of F.B.I. agents, Justice Department prosecutors, air marshals, immigration officers, agricultural inspectors, and tax auditors-“must be conducted under the auspices of the county sheriff with jurisdiction in that county.”

They want to abolish taxes, minimum-wage laws; Social Security; the Environmental Protection Agency; the Department of Education; unelected bureaucrats”; Congressional pensions; Supreme Court jurisdiction in cases involving abortion, religious freedom, and the Bill of Rights; the Federal Reserve; foreign aid, and Obamacare.

I have a simple solution. Let’s encourage them to relocate to Mars where they belong.

10 Responses to Texas Republican Party Belongs on Mars

  1. volgaknight says:

    As scary as the Texas (Republican) platform is what’s infinitely scarier is that approximately 50% of our citizens will vote for the sub-human mutants proposing this lunacy.

    • Yep, you’ve got that right.

      We know we’ve got a serious problem when over 50% of the voters vote consistently against their best interests.

      • racerrodig says:

        Must be something in the water or maybe the breeze blowing in from the Gulf of Mexico….seeing how La. just passed a law that holds the entire oil industry harmless from any lawsuits filed against them from any and all damage caused by said oil industry.

        They must be shooting up natural gas down there…..’cuz every one of them is an air head.

  2. Malisha says:

    The weird part is that many, if not most, Americans feel somehow alienated and vaguely irritated most of the time. When something comes along that really scares them (and that could be anything; I once heard a mom scare her son at the ski lodge by threatening to curtail his TV time), they lose brain-power at the rate of reverse tidal waves. And then they go for phrases that (a) have no meaning and (b) make them think they can get control of their lives.

    Just so do these insane ramblings from such as the Texans quoted above get them to feel “in love again.”

    You can’t fix stupid. But you can definitely get hurt by it!

  3. Probably not fair to the Martians, just sayin.’

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